A full account of the trip to Sydney to see England finally lose 5-0 in the most one sided of Ashes Series.......

We set off quite early for Sydney, everything was collected from the Hotel, and although there appeared to be a mad panic as everyone tried to board the various coaches outside the hotel, we looked to have made the airport in plenty of time for the flight. What we hadn't anticipated however was that the total lack of organization on display.

There was just one queue as you enetered the Departure Lounge, but in the hosts defence, I guess trying to filter through some 30,000
England fans in one morning would have tried even the best laid plans in the World. One almighty shove to the front of the queue appeared to work, but with half of our flight yet to check in, an emergency lane so our plane could leave on time, was opened up and seemed to do the trick as the Captain was able to pull out of the holding position on the runway and start his take off procedure.

After somewhat of a comfortable flight, it was somewhat of a surprise to then endure probably the fastest landing in Aviation history, talk about a rough landing.

The relief of actually landing without blowing any tyres, was enourmous and it was of delight when we left the plane and filtered through various security and onto the coach to take us to the Hotel.

We had previously been informed whilst at Melbourne, that there had been some sort of cock up with the bookings of the hotel for Sydney, and that we would have to upgrade for no extra cost (oh damn!), the views from the 64th (!!) floor of our new hotel were simply outstanding.

As it was new years eve, it would have been rude not to carry out the usual event of celebrating a new year in.

All afternoon was spent in the Irish bar around the corner from our hotel, which i have to say would maybe struggle to win the cleanest pub in the world, but hey it sold the liquid we required to enjoy our first outing in the City.

In truth we lost track of time a little, and before we knew it, time was fast moving on towards late evening. The fireworks down at
Sydney are of course World Famous, but it's also worth noting that it attracts some 2 million visitors, so the chances of actually getting close to them, were small, especially as it was our first day in the City.

We had to go down to one of the harbour bits about 2 miles from Sydney Harbour itself, but I guess the expectation of us just turning up and expecting to get to the front of the celebrations, were somewhat way off!

Still the bit that we were situated still had tons of fireworks, and although it was a separate display to the main celebrations, it was still worthy of note and a few pictures.

As is the case in England (and probably most places around the globe), every bar tried to charge us plenty of dosh to get in, we eventually got in one for 40 dollars and 3 free drinks, so it wasn't all that bad.

One attempt at gate crashing a kids birthday party in order to gain free entry, fell on hard times as the pub manager proceeded to throw us out, along with a couple of guests from the Party, much to their anger, as they hadn't been involved with anything under hand.

We expected New Years Day to be somewhat of a recovery day, All of us went to the Barmy Army V Fantactics game in the afternoon. It was the 5th game of the 'fans' series, and poised nicely at 2 games all, a good healthy 300 odd had turned out to watch the action, on a small cricket ground near to the Sea, in a resort called Coogee Beach.

Rather stupidly I had personally gone to the game without shorts on as it was somewhat wet during the morning, having clearly not learned my lesson that the weather in Auss can change in an instant.

Needless to say the sun came out just as soon as I'd plonked my backside on the freshly cut grass, and with only the option of sitting on the grass verge with my y fronts on, I overcooked myself in the heat, what a thick twit I thought as everyone else lapped up the Sunshine.

The Aussies were to win the Twenty20 game quite comfortably in the end, but it took up a good proportion of the day, and was enjoyable to say the least.

By the time we got back, it was a quick bangers and mash in the Irish Bar, before heading off out again. We agreed to take it easy so that we were ready for the cricket the day after, but it wasn't our fault I suppose that 90% of the bars in
Sydney open 24/7 is it? We finally came in just after 4 o clock, giving ourselves plenty of time to get some sleep ready for the cricket the next day!!

Rather with a lot of surprise, we were all up for 9 o clock on the morning of the 1st day of the last test. this despite getting to bed after 5 o clock, once we'd all sat down and eaten the junk food purchased on the way back from the pub.

The 1st thing to strike us about the Sydney Cricket Ground (SCG) was that the bar stools had put us right out in the sun, all 13,000 odd that had got tickets. We were going to bake later on in the test as the hot weather was coming on the last couple of days, or so we were informed (if it went that far!).

The start was delayed which gave us enough time for breakfast, but after that it was expected that following the previous two nights excursions, that we would probably nod off halfway through the day.

So after about 12 pints of probably slightly better lager than the MCG (still below 3% though), I thought perhaps it was time to take it easy. The atmosphere was slightly more laid back than Melbourne, but was still impressive.

England actually had a better day with the Bat this time round, and finished the day on 234-4, which after the shambles of the performance at Melbourne, gave us some heart that we wouldn't suffer a 5-0 whitewash.

We left the SCG as soon as play ended, missed the free shuttle bus that would have taken us back to the Barmy Army pub, so had to walk 20 minutes not having a clue where we were going.

Despite the cooler temperatures, I had what appeared to be sun stroke, so the night session was probably more subdued that the previous nights in the main part of the City.

We had one quick visit down to the more seedy part of
Sydney, a more imitation of Soho if you like, before heading back for an early 1 o clock finish.

2nd day of the test, and as usual England collapsed and we were forced to watch the bloody Aussies bat much longer than we had hoped for. England eventually just folded to 291 all out, and the depressing feel of watching the hosts pile up a large score was too much for me and Scott, who walked out at tea and proceed to make friends with a couple of locals, who proceeded to buy us a couple of drinks in return for a laugh and a bit of banter.

The Hosts finished the day in somewhat command at 188-4, just 103 runs behind England, the feeling of the 5-0 outcome was getting nearer.

The night was spent in the Casino down near Sydney Harbour, although with a heavy afternoon behind me, proceeded to lose quite a bit of money in the space of all of 5 minutes, so a hasty retreat back to the sanity of the Hotel was in order.

Without doubt the hotest day of the tour so far was on the 3rd day of the cricket, so it had to be easier on the beer and plenty of ice cream and stuff.

Absolutely cooked in it, my brother was well on the way to becoming the original Tango man gone wrong, looks like he should be have been advertising Ribena or something. Greg was still smarting from spending his money in one sitting at the strip joint in Melbourne, and was working out how to stretch his remaining cash for the remainder of the holiday.

By now and certainly at the end of the 3rd day, the Aussies were well on their way to the whitewash, they ended the day in complete control by going over one hundred runs in front of England, before pegging the visitors back to 144-5 come the close of play. Depressing was the one word for the performance shown today. The atmosphere inside the ground had started quite well, with plenty of singing, but come the late afternoon, people were getting tired and hit by the general heat.

Got back from the Cricket and after having another crap subway meal (plastic crap), it was out back around the harbour again for the night proceedings via a watering hole called 'The Scary Canary where there happened to be some band sounding like U2, which was a bit of a co-incidence as they turned out to be U2 tribute band, as I found out upon leaving the premesis !! oops

None of us took the SCG to see the inevitable whitewash on the 4th day of the test, instead heading to Bondi Beach, where i promtly fell asleep all day, only being woken when it was time to leave, missing all the bloody tanned beauties that were on display. Greg though I was assured did the pervert bit by taking a couple of pictures (tut, tut).

The night was spent near to Sydney Harbour, which in itself was a surprise, in the fact that we'd been there for a week and this was to be the 1st time we'd ventured down that way. There were plenty of bars on one street, which would have been rude not to venture into most of em.

Scott was refused entry into one though as he couldn't prove how old he was, even though for most of the holiday it has been Craig and Greg that needed photo ID, unlucky for Scott, and in no way did we remind him of it for the rest of the time of the holiday.

The previous night's excursions took the better of me from the night before, and i was out for the count just after midnight. The other's followed me back shortly after, at around half past 5.

With just a couple of days left, we needed to cram in as much as possible to see everything....

As it should have been the last day of the final test, it was also to be the day of the end of tour party, so perhaps an easier day as the others recovered from the night previous?

I had some catching up to do, so after the photo shoot of the Haslam Out flags near to the Sydney Opera House and the Harbour bridge,

I proceeded to get rid of all my demons from the night before (little did i know that they would come back to haunt me again later), before it was back for a quick change ready for the Barmy Army end of tour thingy that night.

The remainder of our small party assured me that the party went very well, and the pictures would certainly back up that theory.

And so we came to the last day and night of the trip, with me now virtually unable to partake in any sort of activity. Although we had booked a jet boat ride for the last morning, so with some haste I tagged along, with the notion of the fact it was never going to sort out by dicky tummy.

Most of the last night was spent in the bars just round the corner from our hotel, pub full of Australian Man Utd fans watching the FA Cup game with Aston Villa, but i took heart from the fact that there was Amercian only coverage of the game, with 2 dodgy geezers commenting "Aston are on the DEFENCE" which created some humour from the evening.

There was free entry for anyone wearing their Barmy Army gear, rather than paying 20 dollars for doing so. A cracking atmosphere over 5 floors of this massive pub, absolutely packed from 7 o clock onwards. Again though, come half past 12 I started to wilt and spent the rest of the night wishing i hadn't have bothered going out at all. In fairness I reckon with the way i was to feel on Sunday, it wasn't the beer at fault, but some bug i have picked up. I didn't have that much to drink that night so can't explain the unwell bit, perhaps I should have gone to see Dr Kennedy on the Neighbours tour afterall.

It was a quiet end to one hell of a holiday, but being on the big wind down I suppose prepared us for the long journey back home.

And that was about you lot, all we had to look forward to now was the very long trek home. A most enjoyable say over in Tokyo for 4 hours, with a free shower supplied by British Airways thrown and of course a traditional McDonald's breakfast.

The flight into Japan was not without incident as the plane we had to endure for 9 hours was nothing more than your standard type with no or little leg room, depending on what angle you were sat in.

Still, the thought of some fantastic memories got us all through the journey and with weary legs, finally reached Heathrow and the further journey of a mini bus trip all the way home and to sleep it all off.

Who would have thought that by simply taking a flag with the wanting of your chairman out of the club you support, would have made national headlines, it certainly meant that the story could run well past our return date.

We even ended up in the local paper around Mansfield with the story, which basically had a picture of us with the flag under the Harbour Bridge and a brief explanation as to what had happened.

We had met some marvelous people on an amazing journey, and can only recommend that should you ever get the chance, then a trip down under with the Barmy Army is most certainly definitely recommended.

Michael

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